Get Rid Of Your Toughguise

This week when we related violence to males and their need to be masculine, I realized that they go through self-image issues as well as we females do, just in a different way. I know plenty of girls who have a standard for their men. They prefer them to be tall and jacked and not as short as them or as skinny as them. So we are guilty of wanting an ideal guy just as much as men are guilty of wanting an ideal women. However, guys don't realize that we are more accepting of their flaws, than they are of ours. Men are always competing for masculinity because they feel it gives them a sense of power and status which is not needed. What they don't know is that most of the time girls don't like that superficiality. We want a man who has feelings and emotions, not just some hunk of muscle(though I can't speak for all of us). The men who are involved in these school shootings and violence against women are not emotionally or mentally stable. It is all stemmed from insecurities and self-esteem issues. The guys who ridicule others and demean them(the bullies), are often the ones who are the least secure with who they are. Men can hit the gym all they want, but that won't give them the values they really need in order to lead a fulfilling life. I mean, we have always been taught that a bully does what he does because he has issues of his own. So why are we so affected by what people say or think about us? It is society and the media that tell us if we don't look and act this way then we are failures. They tell men that if they are not jacked and do not take control and dominate then they are weak, and god forbid, feminine! The last thing a guy wants to be is like a girl. This is what the media has taught us. So when boys who are not "manly" are constantly harassed for being "gay" or a wuss or anything that is not up to par with society's standards, that is when they lash out. They think that they are proving their bullies wrong. This goes along with that video that begins with the scene from the Incredibles.  When the villain says "now you respect me, because I'm a threat," it is portraying the idea that as long as you gain dominant power over someone, you will be respected. This lesson that males are taught, leads them to be violent and is sadly engraved in their brains starting as early as their childhood.